Wednesday, 13 February 2008

Dont have a Title

Reading through the comments from my last post just made me realise how uniquely different we all are. We see things differently and interpret things differently . For instance my last post Better Late than Never(Click the link or just scroll down..yes down..that is it) 5 comments already and no 2 commenst are alike. For the love of me is wondering why someone will choice Better Late than Never as a wedding toast. She is a Wedding/Event Planner so its understandable that she is wondering. Nyemoni sends best wishes about work. Read her blog and you will realise she is work person too.Whatever that means. 36 is back but mad at all the 'Valentinoes'. Rethots was a bit philosophical which I like. By the way I studied Philosophy for a year in Univeristy before going for Law. With hindsight I think I should have completed that course. I meet some wonderful people in that class.Where in the world is Elumaro. Solomonsydelle who is all things Maternal and more wants more details about my Showdown with my Mummy.

The comments just helped me realise how different we are and why one should always listen to the other side. No thats not what I wanted to say. I meant why Effective Communication is the Bedrock of every successful relationship.be it mother and daughter,husband and wife,employee and employer,colleagues at work,friends and family, boyfriend and girlfriends. That is it. Communication is all we have. Are you saying what you mean? Is the other person listening? Does he hear what you are saying? Does he understnad it? Omo it all boils down to Communication.

So my Mum who is so many things to all of us in the extended family. She is the 1st child of our Patriarch and so they all look up to her. She married an only Child my Dad. She and Maami were like mother and daughter... no that is the wrong analogy cos she doesnt have that kind of relationship with my sista or I. They were quite close and the success of the union not to down play what they feel and still feel for each other was due to the unwavering support my Granny gave my Mum. My Mum could never do wrong. She was always right in her Mother in law's eyes. Many people naturally assumed her MIL was her Mother. She lost her own Mother when she was barely 18. She tells everyone who cares to listen she doubts if her mother would have supported her like her MIL did.How many of us can say we have that kind of relationship with our MILs? My Mum could say that.

Growing up in that kind of home where love and support were not restricted to a few due to circumsatnces of birth or marrriage. I expected a GREAT deal of support from my Mum. However I never get what I want or rather as much support as I want from my Mum. I usually wont complain because I have come to realise that somethings dont change. My Mum is who she is. A miracle is not on my prayer list. We love her all the same but she just isnt the regular Mum. Think of anything that a Regular Naija Mum in her late 50s will do and my Mum is very likely to be doing the exact opposite. She is different. She is beautiful she knows it and she rocks.

Wth age however I expect that she will be more receptive to my 'needs'. I'm a Daddy's gal any day. Mum was in Lagos for a burial. She however came in a week before the burial so she has time to rest ,recover from the 4 plus hour trip from Ilorin,see her Grandchildren, catch up with her Sista (who she speaks to eveyday), generally get ready for the burial. She didnt stay at my place. She always stays at her Sista's place cos she doesnt want to be too much of a burden to us. We appreciate that a lot. Besides when we go to work who will take care of her.My Mum is a Diva.I dont have the headache of wondering what she will eat or drink.

To be contiuned.

I have to go now. Tomorrow is Val and I havent bought Dh a card.

5 comments:

Pink-satin said...

your mom is a diva

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Ah, your mom and mom should be friends. My momsy can party from morning to night. My Husband just can't wrap his head around it. lol! I figure that when you have spent your life living for everyone else, there comes a time when you should focus on your enjoyment. Thankfully, she still takes the time to overwhelm us. lol! Anyway, I will wait to read the rest of this story before making any comment. How was V day? Take care!

Nyemoni said...

LOL! My mum is sooooooo different fromyou mum...LOL...but I wonder how it would have been to have a divalicious mum!

Nonesuch said...

@pink Satin She sure is

@Solomonsydelle Yes o 'they' are party people. Part 2 coming soon to a 'cinema' near you

@Nyemoni I can Imagine.Divalicious Mum sure has its advantages.You can always raid her closet and borrow her Rouge Lipstick.lol.

rethots said...

Hail to mamas.....